I've decided that in order to life a happy, healthy and successful life it's important to focus on the good. I am the type of person that gets caught up in the bad - so much so that it can consume me and physically impact my life. You know that feeling... the one in the pit of your stomach? The one that warms you of some sort of impending doom? Yeah, that's the one. I get that when I'm stressed and focusing on the bad. I did it yesterday, twice. And you know what? I realized that there's not a whole lot I can do to change things and my attitude and physical well-being impact another being, one wholey dependant on me, so I better shape up. It's just not worth it to worry about things that don't really matter in the grand scheme of life. I'm healthy, happy, supported and loved. And I'm growing a beautiful baby boy that I will get to meet in just 11 short weeks.
So when my disillusioned self realizes that when you put yourself out there you will sometimes get burned? Well, let it sting for a bit, and then come to terms with the fact that that chapter is closed (YAY!!!) and those people truly weren't your friends to begin with. It's a sobering thought. Friends have always been fairly difficult for me to find and keep. It always feels a bit awkward with me, and I don't really let myself open up entirely to people in general. I'm pretty good in social situations, I can schmooze with the best of them. However, when it comes down to being a friend, maybe I'm destined to have just a few really good ones in life. Family has always meant more to me than friends. Family may drive you crazy, but they are always there, always supportive in the long run, and don't judge you for the choices you make in life.
So, it's time to pull myself up by my figurative bootstraps, officially close the chapter and just be happy knowing the truth about myself, even if so many others have a different idea. I've got bigger and better things waiting for me in my future and I have my best friend in the whole world to share it with.
I love you PB.